the JOKE thread

[PorkChop]

Barney is a dinosaur of our imagination,

Stuck he's finger up he's bum and dead of constipation

[OmegaFenix]

Barney is a dinosaur of our imagination,

Stuck he's finger up he's bum and dead of constipation

OH... MY.... GOD!!!!! That has to be either the funniest joke ever or that last bit of hope for humanity that I've been clinging to, desperately, for so long has departed taking my sanity with it and causing what can only be described as psychotic/maniacal laughter that would make children cry for their mommies....



Also Barney the Dinosaur is a purple T-Rex like Dinosaur with arms shorter than most male productive organs (See Exhibit A) he couldn't scratch his ass if his imaginary life depended on it let so the chances of him "Sticking his finger up his bum" are about the same as me ever taking your seriously, EVER, if I lived for a Billion Years.

Exhibit A:

[Lydon]

Barney is a dinosaur of our imagination,

Stuck he's finger up he's bum and dead of constipation

That makes no grammatical sense

[MalicE]

That makes no grammatical sense

LOL! I didn't even pick that up
geeez I'm really letting the grammar nazi in me slip

[Saint_Dee]

That makes no grammatical sense

xD I think he was trying to make it fit in with the old "Barney is a dinosaur" tune...

[PorkChop]

So a guy walks into a bar om the 47Th floor of a building, he goes to the bartenter and gets smash'd, he stands up from the bar
And spots 2 equally drunk men and joins them at there table
He offers them $2000 if they can jump out the window and live they decline so he says he'll show them how
He makes a run for the window and jumps and unbelievebly makes it now without a scracth he goes back up to the 47th floor and the two drunk men ask him how he did that "there's a air-conditioning vent just under the window and it will make you land safely on the ground, the two men look at each other and make a run for the window and jump, falling to there bloody death, the bartender sees all this and says "you know you can be a real basterd when your drunk superman"

[OmegaFenix]

xD I think he was trying to make it fit in with the old "Barney is a dinosaur" tune...

So the joke is that he is a little on the soft in the head? Surely "he's" and "his" would not really change tune since its in the middle of the "sentence" (if you want to call that jumbled pile of words a sentence). While what I know of poetry could probably kill a horse or emotionally scare a generation Im pretty sure you only need the end of the phrase to rhyme, so imagination and constipation, which does rhyme keeps the tune, at least poor pork chop got that right...

[PorkChop]

OH... MY.... GOD!!!!! That has to be either the funniest joke ever or that last bit of hope for humanity that I've been clinging to, desperately, for so long has departed taking my sanity with it and causing what can only be described as psychotic/maniacal laughter that would make children cry for their mommies....



Also Barney the Dinosaur is a purple T-Rex like Dinosaur with arms shorter than most male productive organs (See Exhibit A) he couldn't scratch his ass if his imaginary life depended on it let so the chances of him "Sticking his finger up his bum" are about the same as me ever taking your seriously, EVER, if I lived for a Billion Years.

Exhibit A:

Lmao that's funny

[Saint_Dee]

So a guy walks into a bar om the 47Th floor of a building, he goes to the bartenter and gets smash'd, he stands up from the bar
And spots 2 equally drunk men and joins them at there table
He offers them $2000 if they can jump out the window and live they decline so he says he'll show them how
He makes a run for the window and jumps and unbelievebly makes it now without a scracth he goes back up to the 47th floor and the two drunk men ask him how he did that "there's a air-conditioning vent just under the window and it will make you land safely on the ground, the two men look at each other and make a run for the window and jump, falling to there bloody death, the bartender sees all this and says "you know you can be a real basterd when your drunk superman"

I've gotta give you an A+ for persistence xD.

So the joke is that he is a little on the soft in the head? Surely "he's" and "his" would not really change tune since its in the middle of the "sentence" (if you want to call that jumbled pile of words a sentence). While what I know of poetry could probably kill a horse or emotionally scare a generation Im pretty sure you only need the end of the phrase to rhyme, so imagination and constipation, which does rhyme keeps the tune, at least poor pork chop got that right...

That's just about the only thing... Not that it matters.

[OmegaFenix]

I've gotta give you an A+ for persistence xD.

But a F- for execution.

And a Z for originality....

So a guy walks into a bar om the 47Th floor of a building, he goes to the bartenter and gets smash'd, he stands up from the bar
And spots 2 equally drunk men and joins them at there table
He offers them $2000 if they can jump out the window and live they decline so he says he'll show them how
He makes a run for the window and jumps and unbelievebly makes it now without a scracth he goes back up to the 47th floor and the two drunk men ask him how he did that "there's a air-conditioning vent just under the window and it will make you land safely on the ground, the two men look at each other and make a run for the window and jump, falling to there bloody death, the bartender sees all this and says "you know you can be a real basterd when your drunk superman"

Hmmmmmm....

Three guys were standing at the top of the Empire
State Building in NYC. The first guy says to the
second, "You know, the wind currents are so
strong here in NYC that one could step off the
edge of the building and literally float in
mid-air due to the upward thrust of the thermal
air current."

"No way, man, you're crazy," said the second guy
to the first. So the first guy steps off the edge
of the building and justs floats in mid-air for
about 20 seconds and then returns to the roof of
the building.

The second guy is simply thrilled and says,
"Watch me do that" as he steps from the edge roof
into the open air. Of course he falls like a
stone straight down all the way to the waiting
pavement below--SPLAT!

The third guy, who has remained quiet the entire
time, leans over to the first guy and say, "You
know something Superman, sometimes you can be a
real asshole!"

There appears to be some similarities....