Snake on a plane forces emergency landing (for real)

Motherf***ing snake on a motherf***ing plane

Tarryn van der BylDecember 5, 2012

Proving that sometimes life does, in fact, imitate art (or at least a reasonable facsimile of art), an Egypt Air flight from Cairo to Kuwait was forced to make an emergency landing on Monday after an Egyptian cobra got loose in the cabin.

According to reports, a 48-year old Jordanian man smuggled the cobra onboard somehow, and subsequently lost control of the highly venomous snake after it bit his hand. In a scene straight out of my worst nightmares, the cobra then slithered under nearby passenger seats, presumably writhing and hissing and spitting with evil, murderous intent, because that’s basically what snakes do.

The owner refused medical treatment, even though an Egyptian cobra’s venom is pretty much totally lethal, and his fate is unknown. The cobra was confiscated by authorities, and hopefully burned on a pyre somewhere. Or it’s under my bed right now. That’s it, I’m never sleeping again.