If you play Justin Bieber songs backwards, you can hear Satan messages...
Even worse, if you play them forward, you can hear Justin Bieber! :eek:
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If you play Justin Bieber songs backwards, you can hear Satan messages...
Even worse, if you play them forward, you can hear Justin Bieber! :eek:
So this one time, a seal walks into a club.
Did it hurt?
You'd have to ask him, but he's dead :DQuote:
Originally Posted by Crzwaco
Koos vat sy gesin KAAP toe. Sy seun Jannie maak vriende met n coloured laaitie.
"Jy is seker n Local" vra Jannie, "want ek sien jou voor tande is uit?"
Die coloured sien Jannie se braces in sy mond en vra, "en Jy is seker van Gauteng né?"
"Hoe het jy dit geweet" vra Jannie
"Want ek sien jy het Burglar Bars In Jou Bek"
In 1872 the Australians invented the condom, using a sheep's intestine.
In 1873 the Scottish refined the idea by taking the intestine out of the sheep first.
What do you do when you miss your mother-in-law?
You reload and shoot again.
:D
Hoekom ek drink !!!
Miskien is ek verkeerd, maar sedert ek 10 dae gelede opgehou drink het, doen mense goed wat die [email protected] uit my irriteer.
Soos wanneer iemand na sy arm wys wanneer hy my vra hoe laat dit is.
Ek weet waar my horlosie is, pêl - waar de f*k is joune? WYS EK NA MY TOTTIE AS EK VRA WAAR DIE TOILET IS ??
Of soos wanneer iemand van sy stoel af opstaan en die hele donnerse kamer vol soek na die remote.
STAP NA DIE BLIKSEMSE TV, STEL DIE VOLUME OP EN KOM SIT OP JOU GAT!!
En as die bobbejaan Dan die remote kry sal hy opmerk: "Dis altyd op die laaste plek waar jy soek."
NATUURLIK KRY JY DIT OP DIE LAASTE PLEK WAAR JY SOEK!!! Watter idioot sal nou aanhou f*kken soek as jy die ding klaar gekry het?
En as jy in 'n fliek sit en iemand vra: "Het jy dit gesien?"
Nee, drol, ek het R45 betaal om na die fliek se vloer te kom staar!!!
Of as iemand vra: "Kan ek jou 'n vraag vra?"
Wil jy my nog n f*kken vraag vra want jy't my MOS nou al klaar 'n vraag gevra!!
En Dan se 'n ou “Jy sal my nie glo nie maar ek het 10 kilo’s verloor".
HELLOOOOOOOO DUH, VERTEL MY IETS WAT EK SAL GLO.
Of wanneer hierdie advertensie-etters iets adverteer as: "New and Improved".
Wat is dit nou eintlik??? As iets nuut is, was daar MOS nie iets voor dit nie, en as dit "improved" is, moes daar MOS iets gewees het waarop "geimprove" is. So hoe de f*k kan dit nou "New" EN "Improved" wees???
Of as iemand sê: "Die lewe is kort"
[email protected]!!! Dis die langste f*kken ding wat jy ooit sal beleef!!! Wat gaan jy doen wat langer as dit is??
Of as jy vir die bus sit en wag en iemand vra of die bus al gekom het.
As die bus al gekom het, sou ek nog hier gesit en wag het, poepol???
Dan kry jy 'n bekende wat jou raakloop by 'n plek (club/sokker/rugby veld) en hy/sy vra: “Wat maak jy hier?”
EK HET NET GOU KOM [email protected] EN JY?
RAAI WAT??? EK HET WEER BEGIN DRINK.
Little Johnny returns from school and tells his father he got an "F" in Arithmetic today.
"Why?" asks his father.
"The teacher asked, 'How much is 2 x 3?' I said "6".
"But that's right," said his father.
"Then she asked me 'How much is 3 x 2?'
"What's the fucking difference?" asks his father.
"That's what I said!"
Two old ladies were outside their nursing home having a smoke when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigerette, and continued smoking.
Lady 1 What's that?
Lady 2 A condom.
Lady 1 Where'd you get it?
Lady 2 You can get them at any Chemist.
The next day lady 1 hobbles into the local chemist and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a packet of condoms. The pharmacist looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, in her 80's), but politely asks what brand she perfers. Doesn't matter, she replies , as long as it fits a Camel.
The pharmacist fainted