Failed Marvel Comics

[Shamrock]

I found this page on Marvel's website which lists all their characters:
http://www.marvel.com/universe/Category:People

And oh my god do they have some stupid ideas. To link some of my favorites:

http://www.marvel.com/universe/3-D_Man
"Through concentration, Hal could merge the images of his brother imprinted on his glasses and thus cause his brother Chuck to reappear as a three-dimensional man, clad in an altered version of his experimental flight suit and endowed with physical abilities roughly three times greater than those of an ordinary human. Hal would fall into a trance-like state when Chuck appeared, and Chuck could only exist in the three-dimensional world for three hours at a time, after which Hal had to revive."

I'd love to have the superpower to summon my brother.

All-American
http://www.marvel.com/universe/All-American

"Abilities
All-American can run at nearly 40 mph for around 10 minutes before starting to tire, can lift over 1 ton and is bulletproof to calibers up-to-and-including automatic weapons. He is also a moderately skilled martial artist.

Paraphernalia
Bulletproof Kevlar uniform and helmet."

I don't get it, if he's bulletproof why does he wear Kevlar?

http://www.marvel.com/universe/Cap'n_Oz

I love the patriotic superheroes. All-American, Cap'n Oz (which doesn't make sense anyway because it says he's from the UK?) and Captain America. I'm gunna go and make "Captain South Africa" for fun.

Haha, quite a funny site.

[HANDsolo]

All-American
http://www.marvel.com/universe/All-American

"Abilities
All-American can run at nearly 40 mph for around 10 minutes before starting to tire, can lift over 1 ton and is bulletproof to calibers up-to-and-including automatic weapons. He is also a moderately skilled martial artist.

Paraphernalia
Bulletproof Kevlar uniform and helmet."

I don't get it, if he's bulletproof why does he wear Kevlar?

Just sounds like some guy pumped up on roids who wears body armour

[Shamrock]

Hahaha, pretty much. I just love the patriotism. The pinnacle of American achievement.

[Voicy]

They sound more like GI Joe character than actual superheroes :/

Not that GI Joe characters are lame by any means ... watch out for the GI Joe movie being released this year! Snake-eyes will pwn!

[HANDsolo]

Knowing is half the battle! Yo Joe!!

[Shamrock]

A GI Joe movie? I never really got into GI Joe. The Hulk would kick GI Joe's ass.

[phoenix]

Shamrock, I would be interested in knowing what powers you have in mind for "Captain South Africa"

[Shamrock]

Shamrock, I would be interested in knowing what powers you have in mind for "Captain South Africa"

He can smell rapists within a forty kilometer radius and can summon a taxi capable of speeds of over 400km/h and a sound system that can make people's ears bleed. Only usable in Durban.

[iOverflow]

Captain South Africa lol, You mean Zuma right?

[Voicy]

Captain South Africa lol, You mean Zumatello right?

Fixed

He has amazing mind control powers that he'll use so that at some point you can't belief!