Adidas Unveils New Running Shoe For Fleeing From Mass Shootings

[Edelweiss]

So I just stumbled across this article and just had to share it.

From its reinforced tread engineered specifically for running in a zigzag pattern to its whisper-quiet, low-squeak rubber, the Bystander combines speed and stealth to create the perfect shoe for escaping or hiding from an armed murderer,” Adidas CEO Herbert Hainer said at a press conference. “And its brand-new Firmo-Grip sole minimizes slippage, even when you’re panicked and need to move quickly through puddles of freshly spilled blood. No shoe has ever been better suited for today’s running, crouching, and cowering needs.” The shoes, which go on sale at the end of the month, will be available for wearers as young as 5.

Who's target market??

sauce: http://www.theonion.com/articles/adi...-from-m,32432/

[Edelweiss]

So I just stumbled across this article and just had to share it.

From its reinforced tread engineered specifically for running in a zigzag pattern to its whisper-quiet, low-squeak rubber, the Bystander combines speed and stealth to create the perfect shoe for escaping or hiding from an armed murderer,” Adidas CEO Herbert Hainer said at a press conference. “And its brand-new Firmo-Grip sole minimizes slippage, even when you’re panicked and need to move quickly through puddles of freshly spilled blood. No shoe has ever been better suited for today’s running, crouching, and cowering needs.” The shoes, which go on sale at the end of the month, will be available for wearers as young as 5.

Who's target market??

sauce: http://www.theonion.com/articles/adi...-from-m,32432/

[MetalSoup]

Who's target market??

sauce: http://www.theonion.com/articles/adi...-from-m,32432/

Hopefully you are aware that The Onion is a parody website.

[Edelweiss]

I deserve to be hanged for this...
*facepalms*

[Hagan]

I deserve to be hanged for this...
*facepalms*

Ha ah nee! Vir jou!
Hai shame...
Walk away, I'll cover your exit.

[Edelweiss]

Ha ah nee! Vir jou!
Hai shame...
Walk away, I'll cover your exit.

Blame for the comp rules and the burning desire that shiny new xbox
*stares at dusty wii*
*sobs*

[Hagan]

Blame for the comp rules and the burning desire that shiny new xbox
*stares at dusty wii*
*sobs*

So do I.

Mods, when you arrive here, you may close down this thread, please - before it gets out of control.

[PsychoFish]

Who's target market??

Clearly it's aimed sociopaths or participants in marathons in the US

[MetalSoup]

Did you post this twice?

[Edelweiss]

Did you post this twice?

why would I post something so shameful twice?? Please don't reply to this thread anymore lol
Please remove this thread!
EDIT: OMFG I DID! THE WORST DAY EVER!!!!!
pm'ed James to remove point penalty deduction for duped threads
sorry guys.
Thread closed.