Here's a bit of fun. I was looking at an article on RockPaperShotgun about the COD Infinite Warfare announcement where they posted the official marketing spiel about the game. Standard hyperbolic stuff, but then in the comments someone reposted the blurb but without most of the adjectives and it was quite entertaining to read. Check it out below:

The original marketing blurb
“Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare puts storytelling front and center in a rich, immersive narrative. Infinity Ward breaks new ground by exploring the weight of leadership and its responsibilities. In a desperate time of overwhelming adversity, the player, as Captain of their own warship, must take command against a relentless enemy. Experienced soldiers are thrust into extraordinary circumstances that will test their training and reveal their true character as they learn to lead and to make the hard decisions necessary to achieve victory. The game also introduces stunning, never before seen environments, new weaponry and inventive player abilities to Call of Duty. The entire campaign – from boots-on-ground combat to piloting high speed space-fighters – occurs as a near seamless experience with few visible loading times, and delivers the hallmark, blockbuster franchise moments that fans love.”
And now the hilarious, edited blurb
Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare puts storytelling in a narrative. Infinity Ward breaks ground by exploring weight and its responsibilities. In a time of adversity, the player, as Captain of their warship, must take command against an enemy. Soldiers are thrust into circumstances that will test their training and reveal their character as they learn to lead and make decisions necessary to achieve victory. The game also introduces environments, weaponry and abilities to Call of Duty. The campaign – from combat to fighters – occurs as an experience with loading times and delivers franchise moments that fans love.
I love the "occurs as an experience with loading times..."

Feel free to post your own attempt with whatever advertising blurbs you can find. I'll look for one of my own to add.