the JOKE thread

[_Caboose_]

A Chicken and a horse are best friends.

They walking in the farm where its been raining heavily suddenly the horse falls into a mud pit and is stuck.

"Quick go get the farmer" Said the horse

The chicken runs off and shouts to the farmer, the farmer rushes off in his BMW M3 and sees the horse stuck and pulls him out.

The next day the chicken gets stuck in the same mud hole.

The Horse tells the chicken...

"Hey grab onto my long john and ill pull you out"

The chicken grabs a hold and is pulled out by the horse.




Moral of the story: You dont need a BMW to pick up chicks

[Weasley]

three male mice are sitting at a bar with three shots of tequila
arguing about how tough they are.
The first mouse says,
"i'm so tough i break into the cupboard just to eat the rat poison.
" he slams down his tequila and looks at the second mouse.
The second mouse replies,
"that's nothing. I'm so tough i run through a mouse trap,
grab the cheese, flip onto my back & bench-press the
killer springed trapwire." he slams down
his tequila and looks at the third mouse.
The third mouse slams down histequila
slides off his stool and begins walking away from the bar.
The other mice scream, "oi! Softy!, where do you think you're going?!
The third mouse replies, "home, to shag the cat."

lol +10000:d

[HANDsolo]

Three couples are having supper breakfast together one morning.
The one husband asks his wife, "Pass the sugar, sugar."
The second husband asks his wife, "Pass the honey, honey."
The third husband asks his wife, "Pass the bacon, jou vark."

[HANDsolo]

"Did you see Jacob's Cross last night?"
"Eish. I did not know he was even angry."

[wizdumb]

Mike en Kallie vlieg oor Afrika. Die vlieenier kondig aan.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are now entering Ethiopain airspace. where 40 percent of the population are infected with TB, the other 60 percent are infected with HIV."

Wat se daai ou?" vra Mike vir Kallie.

"Hy se as die vliegtuig nou val, spyker ons net die wat hoes!...

[Deceptor]

Three male mice are sitting at a bar with three shots of tequila
arguing about how tough they are.
The first mouse says,
"I'm so tough I break into the cupboard just to eat the rat poison.
" He slams down his tequila and looks at the second mouse.
The second mouse replies,
"That's nothing. I'm so tough I run through a mouse trap,
grab the cheese, flip onto my back & bench-press the
killer springed trapwire." He slams down
his tequila and looks at the third mouse.
The third mouse slams down histequila
slides off his stool and begins walking away from the bar.
The other mice scream, "Oi! Softy!, where do you think you're going?!
The third mouse replies, "Home, to shag the cat."

OMW that is so damn funny!

[Weasley]

Mike en Kallie vlieg oor Afrika. Die vlieenier kondig aan.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are now entering Ethiopain airspace. where 40 percent of the population are infected with TB, the other 60 percent are infected with HIV."

Wat se daai ou?" vra Mike vir Kallie.

"Hy se as die vliegtuig nou val, spyker ons net die wat hoes!...

lol the best one yet

[HANDsolo]

A Black Baby was given wings by God.
He asked God, "Does this mean I'm an Angel now?"
God laughed and said,
"N!gga Please............you're a bat!"

[_Caboose_]

A Black Baby was given wings by God.
He asked God, "Does this mean I'm an Angel now?"
God laughed and said,
"N!gga Please............you're a bat!"

Rofl omg thats good

[_Caboose_]

Whats the definition of relitive humidity?

Doing the naughty with your cousin and u start sweating down below.