Rumour, speculation, and gossip around the planet’s most unequivocal hub of truthfacts (that’s the internet) has it that Sony’s codenamed-Next Generation Portable next generation portable is called the PlayStation Vita. If this turns out to be real, somebody in the company’s marketing department should obviously be tried in the Hague for crimes against everything, ever.

I mean, even Michael Pachter has declared it “the dumbest name ever”, and Michael Pachter knows what he’s talking about. Sometimes.

Lending some spotty credibility to the claims is the recent discovery of domain names ‘psvita.com’ and ‘vita.scedev.com’, although their affiliation with Sony isn’t (yet) official.

In all likelihood, though, it’s probably just some sort of placeholder. The handheld was previously rumoured to be dubbed “Arc”, which is also kind of crap, but much better than “Vita”. At least the word “arc” makes me think of lightning bolts, and lightning bolts are awesome.

Doubtless enough, Sony will reveal all at E3 next week. Inb4 the “PSP 4000”.