Exclusive! New evidence of Steam console partnership with Gamestop

19 October 2012

Further cementing earlier reports of a “Steam Corporation” partnership with US retailer Gamestop on a “new console that lets you download games and access the best of Steam, as well as stream TV shows, movies, and music, all on your TV,” MyGaming has exclusively received a leaked promotion image.

Below you can see the initial really, truly, totally legit GameStop screencap that PROVES the Valve Steam Box is a real thing, sourced from well-known industry insider, Reddit user “Xilarating“.

The typos in the copy, the fact that Steam Corporation isn’t an actual entity, the nearly inscrutably small and poorly Photoshopped images in the corner, and the implication that Valve would allow GameStop to blast out what is probably one of their most closely-guarded current research and development secrets, all point to classic red herring tactics – we should therefore believe everything we see on the internet.

MyGaming has now received further proof that the Valve Steambox exists, from our reliable industry insider close to the source, who can only reveal himself as “Qornea”.

Our source says that Valve has set up a new division within its organisational structure, named Steam Corporation, that will focus on developing and delivering an eco-friendly and cost-effective home console option to those who have until now only been able to afford cheap Chinese 8-bit console knock-offs.

The Steambox will come bundled with one ergonomic controller, with additional controllers sold seperately [sic], so you can engage in epic multiplayer sessions, or fix your wobbly patio furniture. The source noted that, despite the “Steambox” moniker, due to structural technicalities, one should not actually put steam anywhere near the box. “This is a no-no,” he said.

NB: In case it wasn’t blatantly obvious, this article was satirical.

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