The best of South Park: The Stick of Truth

South Park: The Stick of Truth has been out for a few weeks now, and achieved a critical hit: The Stick of Truth: would Mr. Mackey approve?

I have completed the game and along the journey through this crazy adventure came moments that I will never forget. Some may go down as my best gaming moments in history, but for all the wrong reasons.

Here are my best moments in South Park Stick of Truth, obviously proceed with caution – *Warning! Spoilers follow*

Khloe Kardashian Abortion

During the abortion clinic level you battle your way through dozens of Nazi Zombie Foetuses. These little creatures are babies that have not yet fully developed, they are apparently from the dustbin in the clinic, and have come into contact with the Nazi goo.

If the idea of Nazi Zombie Foetus grossed you out, then at the end of the level you would just switch off your console. The boss of that Clinic is none other than Khloe Kardashian’s abortion (she came in earlier that day and had it done).

This foetus is about as big as a doorway and as ugly as they come. The twisted humour of the moment killed me and is one of my favourite parts of the game.

All the Summons

The game features a few special characters to summon during battle and they all have intensely wrong spells and animations.

For example, Mr. Hankey (the Christmas poo) is dressed as Mickey Mouse from Fantasia. He then controls waves of faeces and drowns your enemies.

Mr. Slave runs towards and enemy, jumps in the air, pulls off his pants and sits down hard, swallowing them whole through his anus.

The trip up Mr Slave’s anus

During the final stages of the game things go really wrong. You are instructed to travel up Mr. Slave’s back passage and disarm a nuclear bomb that has been lodged up there during what he thought was a sexual experience with a large group of FBI agents.

During your trip, you will come into contact with some rather dirty sex toys as well as used condoms. You will slice your way up his rectum through webs of white goo, and power up these sex toys to proceed.

This portion of the game was extremely well designed and basically showcased everything about Mr. Slave. Big Gay Al even makes an appearance. Faeces everywhere, white slime, anal beads, this killed me!

Battling the Gnomes while your parents have a sex session

During the second night in South Park you will be woken up by gnomes stealing your underwear. Previously you will see a scene in which your parents suddenly start making love.

You shrink yourself and go after these gnomes, and you battle them in some clever very cleverly placed areas where the background is your parents making some rather intense love.

Further on you battle the boss on the bed – all you see are breasts swinging above you and during the battle you even have to dodge your father’s testicles that come swinging by. After the battle you then get squashed under your dads, um, well you get it.

Canada!

Mocking Canada is one of the main themes in the South Park series, and in Stick of Truth we get to go there. In Canada you are introduced to a whole new land, the towns and people are all flat, and it is designed like a 16-bit Zelda game.

The soundtrack is old school and when you get to a pier you turn into a boat and the soundtrack changes. This not only mocks Zelda, but also the Final Fantasy series – it’s really clever.

So there you have it, feel free to go wash your eyes out if need be. Have you played South Park: Stick of Truth? What is your favourite moment so far?