ALWAYS
I’ve been playing this one for a few weeks already, but James’s 6 Awesome Browser Games feature reminded me that I’d forgotten to tell everyone else about it, and how much I love you all.
I WANNA BE WITH YOU
Robot Unicorn Attack is a free, browser-based Flash game hosted over at Adult Swim, which is probably pretty much the only place in the universe this sort of game would actually ever turn up. It’s also probably pretty much the most gay game ever made, and I mean “gay” in the very legitimately “OMG, it’s totally gay, darling” sense, not the very butch and very heterosexual “OMG, I’m totally teabagging you” sense.
AND MAKE BELIEVE WITH YOU
The premise is simple – keep moving, avoid obstacles, don’t fall off the edge. That’s a fabulous robot unicorn you’ll be doing that with, mind you, and the world’s all full of love and melted candy floss and love and rainbows and love and flying dolphins and… love and stuff. Your gorgeous unicorn can simply jump over obstacles, although – in a stunning metaphorical paean to true love’s ultimate consummation – he can perform a rainbow dash and smash through these instead.
AND LIVE IN HARMONY, HARMONY
The trick to scoring (oooh!) big in this game is collecting all the fairies and shattering all the walls we build around ourselves. Well, the stars. Keep this up, and your score multiplies enormously. Just like a real night out in Green Point.
OH, LOVE
Of course, what really makes this game is the soundtrack – a looped, bass-heavy remix of Erasure’s glitter-powered, definitive 1990s dancefloor anthem, Always – also probably the greatest song in the universe. I mean, if you’re not singing along by the second chorus, you’re either still in the closet or very recently dead. There will be no shame.
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