'Magic penis' killing set for trial date

Lycanthrope

Lycanthrope

New member
Posted this on MyBB earlier, but this lunacy needs to be shared with the world...

Malalane - A trial date is expected to be set on Thursday for 12 people arrested in connection with setting a pastor alight after accusing him of using a magic penis to sleep with women.

The nine men and three women, aged between 28 and 50 will appear in the Boschfontein periodical court in Mpumalanga on charges murder and arson.

The villagers, among them a community induna (headman), were arrested on February 24 after Albert Malwane, a pastor of the Izwi Zion Christian Church, was burnt to death a day before.

Mpumalanga police spokesperson Leonard Hlathi said that Malwane had been dragged from his one-roomed house in the Etitandini informal settlement near Jeppes Reef south of Malalane and taken to a hill, where he was set alight.

Malwane's house was also burnt and his wife and daughter went into hiding.

Community members had accused him of talking to animals and using an invisible penis to sleep with women in the informal settlement.

They also accused his wife of turning into a snail and terrorising the community.

The villagers also complained that Malwane's family had used muti to make then sick after Malwane's death.

One of the accused had to be carried into the Boschfontein periodical court when the 12 appeared in court on April 8.

Timothy Malwane, the father of the deceased, believes a curse was released at the pastor’s funeral.

The 12 accused have not been asked to plead.
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Source: News24

Okay, look, I have no idea if this has been posted before so forgive me if it has but, honestly, I wouldn't even know what to search for: magic penis, snail wife, pastor voodoo? Seriously, where would I begin?

But, back to all seriousness: TERRORISED BY A SNAIL!?!? :wtf:

Edit: The more I think about this... Living in an informal settlement, shacks, impoverishment and all that goes with it... if the biggest concern you have in life is being terrorised by... A SNAIL... things can't really be THAT bad, can they? O.o' I mean, seriously, we need some perspective on this matter.
 
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That awkward moment when you let everyone know you have a sexual relationship with an invisible, magic penis...
 
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Tragic. These sorts of stories happen all too often. Superstition runs rife and people are murdered at the hand of twisted mob justice.
 
You know the rednecks you get in America, well I think we can officially classify these shanty towns as redneck counties :rolleyes:. Those people whould be locked up in the padded cells next to mine :p
 
Anyone up for a nice big glass of gullible? It's horrible how these things happen, but in the end this has been going on for centuries. Even if you think it's funny, consider this; This Pastor's wife and daughter are in hiding. Probably scared and fearing for their lives. To me it's not funny at all, what if it was your wife/girlfriend? You're dead, burned to death. Horrible way to die.
 
One would be forgiven for saying that they (the mob) certainly still live way in the past. Shockingly too common a thing in Africa.
 
axon1988 said:
Anyone up for a nice big glass of gullible? It's horrible how these things happen, but in the end this has been going on for centuries. Even if you think it's funny, consider this; This Pastor's wife and daughter are in hiding. Probably scared and fearing for their lives. To me it's not funny at all, what if it was your wife/girlfriend? You're dead, burned to death. Horrible way to die.
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You're right. I think I zeroed in on the terrorist snail, invisible member part of the story without considering the rest. It really is quite sad.
 
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