Funny poems and limericks.

MetalSoup

MetalSoup

There's a GIF for that
The limerick packs laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical.
But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.




Post your favourite funny poems and limericks.

No serious ones please, leave that for the artsy fartsy thread. :p

ylgOMpk.jpg
 
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Said an ovum one night to a sperm,
"You're a very attractive young germ.
Come join me, my sweet,
Let our nuclei meet
And in nine months we'll both come to term."

- Isaac Asimov
 
A man named Mister Four Four
Once came knocking on my front door.
When I opened he said;
with his teary eyes, red:
"Nobody can rep me no more."
 
There are holes in the sky
Where the rain gets in
But they're ever so small
That's why the rain is thin

~ Spike Milligan
 
A crazy waco once said
as he put down the book that he read
"I'll sit here with cold cheese
and I'll do as I please"
I don't think he's quite right in the head.
 
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There is this one fellow called Dampi
His giveaway strat was 'bit bumpy.
Temporarily banned,
but he came back as planned
And his luck made some members quite grumpy.
 
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Ouma en oupa sit op die stoep
Oupa gee 'n lekker poep
Ouma sê "Sies wat stink so?"
Oupa sê "JOU P**S MAN!"

~ Jan
 
"Oh freddled gruntbuggly,
Thy micturations are to me
As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes,
And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts
With my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!"
 
lunanoir said:
"Oh freddled gruntbuggly,
Thy micturations are to me
As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes,
And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts
With my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!"
Click to expand...

Sounds Vogon
 
Lament of a Gamer

Fridays are magic
and Mondays are tragic,
Tuesdays are slow
and Thursdays really blow
Saturdays are lazy
and Wednesdays are crazy
But Sundays...
Glorious, wonderful Sundays...
It's on Sundays that I'll frag your b!tch-@ss, ****er!
 
Eugene said:
There is this one fellow called Dampi
His giveaway strat was 'bit bumpy.
Temporarily banned,
but he came back as planned
And his luck made some members quite grumpy.
Click to expand...

Dampi payed his dues,
Apologized after a month's exile in the dunes.
Then he posted more GA's,
yet still can't down live his mistakes.
 
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