Ok... Read the essay
im going to admit that im hypocritical due to the fact that i took a dig out of whisper in the GW2 thread... but im opinionated and can go keyboard warrior from time to time, so sue me
on to the topic at hand!
Find a group of regular players and chill with them on Teamspeak as well as play frequently with them. Joining pub games solo opens you up to a lot of abuse if you arent average to moderately skilled in the game. We have players in our clan that have recently gotten into dota 2 *cough* R4C3 *cough* and by playing with us not only are they getting better, but they are abused a hell of a lot less when you have 3-4 guys with [SS] clan tags.
I also had spans of issues with insults when i started out, so you will learn to tune them assclowns out. Ive found recently that CS:GO and Dota (most moba titles actually) communities are particularly venomous. And 90% of the venom is from children with e-peens the size of a large city. I've also had my fair share of run ins with afrikaans gamers that have gone so south i stopped playing the game online for months, the original dota on warcraft 3 i stopped altogether because of the unending flaming i would get.
As for the language barrier, i speak only two languages, Engrish and BAD Engrish, so i have difficulty with Afrikaans players (and im in a very Afr clan at that). After a while you can pick up the gist of what the guys are saying but again it comes down to learning how to phase them out (selective hearing FTW). Another thing which is quite useful in just about all online games these days, if the whole "sticks and stones" thing doesnt work for you, is a mute function. I have probably half of russia muted by now \m/^_^\m/
I'm also very guilty of raging in games at times but i curse/threaten/abuse the air around me and very seldom go apeshit on chat or text chat unless its with buddies on TS because its just easier to write off the issue as life experience and move on than cause a flame war with the true n00b with the damaged e-peen.
As its been said above, there are a lot of douchebags out there and i know a fair few by name, but something i enjoy doing is using their rage and insults as motivation to utterly destroy them be it as a K/D ratio or actual kills, and if you cant do this, either leave the game and enter a new one or just keep on trollin 'cause they already hate your guts.
Re-read this post now and it seems a bit all over the place for me... I BLAME MONDAYS!!